Not Kidding Around
by dshell99
Summary: [The Alphas] Eddward comes to visit Kevin, but the divorced dad has his hands full with his two kids. Til he doesn't. And Eddward isn't quite sure what to make of it. Disclaimer: I don't own Ed, Edd, N Eddy. I only own my random OCs and plot. Rev!Edd goes to Asphyxion. Cover art by Rez the Eighth.


**Author's Note: You know that moment when you see something and you're like, "Yeah, I'm gonna make that a thing!" So yeah, that happened.**

 **Again.**

 ** _Naturally..._**

 **Thanks Rez_the_Eighth!**

 _ **For Anybodihearme...**_

"EDDWARD!"

Eddward barely had time to acknowledge Kevin's namesake before the second grader leapt onto his back and did his best to _squeeze_ the life out of him.

"Hello, to you, too, Kev," he wheezed with a smile as he adjusted the brat on his back and turned to look at him as he asked, "Where's your Da?"

Kevin's mini doppelganger gave him a scared look before Eddward heard Kevin's voice ring out.

"KJ!? Where are ya?!"

"With _me,"_ Eddward called back as he finished walking up the driveway and into the open garage where Anna sat on a small pink chair, her bucket of barrettes and ribbons on her lap, Kevin behind her on his rolling garage stool.

"Hey, _you!"_ Kevin grinned as he undid loose looped over ponytails, spraying detangling spray as he went. "KJ, get down so Edd can walk."

"NEVER!" the boy screamed as he scrambled down off of Eddward, ran into the corner where the deep freezer was, grabbed his scooter and helmet before running back to his dad and whining for help.

"Let me," Eddward sighed as he reached out for the helmet in the boy's hand.

The smol child dejectedly handed it over, a bit preturbed that his father's attention was on his little sister at the moment.

But once Eddward had the safety gear in place, he took off with a yell, scooting down the street as fast he could to go find something to get into and someone to get into it with.

* * *

"What's up?" Kevin asked slowly as he eyed the direction his son took off in before turning his attention back to a wild mane of curly, light strawberry blond hair that he was trying his _daddy damnedest_ to tame.

"Nothing really," Eddward shrugged. "I was in the neighborhood, so I figured I'd swing by and see what you guys were getting into."

"I'm going to Marianne's!" Anna said brightly. "We're gonna watch My Little Pony and Powderpuff Girls and then her mom said she would do our nails for her nail party!"

Eddward looked down into excited green eyes and snorted.

"Well, I'm sure you're going to be very pretty."

"Pretty much _abandoning_ me," Kevin snipped and while Eddward's heart went out to him, Anna rolled her eyes with an expertise only perfected by Nazz.

 _"You said_ I could go!" The girl protested as she whipped her head around to pout at him and he bopped her on the head with the comb to make her turn back around.

 _"I know what I said,"_ he sighed as he clipped a barrette around the end of a braided pigtail. "But _no red polish_ , and you can only get the sticker decal things for kids."

"Yes, Sir," she whispered and Eddward patted her arm sympathetically before jogging into the house for a soda for Kevin and a juice pouch for his boyfriend's princess.

* * *

The small talk was minimal as Kevin finished her hair, his concentration on plaiting her wild hair into something that looked _decent_. Marianne showed up to take her back to her house just as Kevin was finishing up and the two girls took off just as fast as KJ did, Marianne was driving her pink 8 volt Jeep that was an exact replica of her mother's bright white one, though.

After the kids left, Eddward was pulled into Kevin's lap as he rolled back towards the back of the garage, hitting the button on the remote in his jeans pocket as he did so and did what he had wanted to do as soon as he thought he heard Eddward's hot rod pull up and squeezed him just as hard as KJ did.

 _"Kevin!"_

Kevin pouted a bit as he let go and looked up into frustrated ice blue eyes that glimmered in the garage's dim overhead light.

"Why didn't you tell me you were coming?" Kevin asked as he pushed him up to stand and quickly stood himself, kicking his rolling chair towards his deconstructed Harley.

"Didn't really think about it til I got to your street," Eddward shrugged, the pink blush on his face made _bubble gum_ by the garage light.

"What were you doing out today?" Kevin laughed as he gathered hair supplies and his soda and headed back into the house.

"Same old, same old," the raven sighed as he followed him inside. "Went to see Mother, put some new wild flowers on the family plot, to the store -"

 _"Here,"_ Kevin teased and Eddward rolled his eyes.

"Excuse me for wanting to see my _boyfriend,"_ he half groaned, half pouted as he crossed his arms and leaned on the doorframe to the kitchen where Kevin was washing hair gel off his hands.

"You're excused," Kevin grinned before he flicked his wet hands at him and then shoved him to the side as he headed to the living room.

The redheaded mechanic knew the sociology professor was pitching a bit of a fit behind him as he plopped on the couch, so he turned emphatic eyes on him and said, "I've got the kids this weekend, Edd. I'm not gonna be much company."

"And yet, there isn't a child to be found," Eddward retorted as he came to sit next to him.

"Give it twenty minutes," Kevin snorted as he turned on the TV.

* * *

Nearly five hours later, Duke had sent Purdue back to Indiana with their tails between their legs, KU was getting walloped by Eddward's West Virginia alma mater, and the kids were _still_ gone.

Eddward was getting nervous as it was nearing mid afternoon and the kids had missed lunch, but Kevin knew better as not only were his kids resourceful, but they had friends and family all over the neighborhood keeping an eye on them and spoiling them and their friends with all the snacks and sometimes meals they could ever want.

"Want to order pizza and watch Pokemon with us later?" the redhead asked as the KU vs West Virginia game headed into half time.

"Where are they _now, Kevin?!"_

"Annie is at Mari's remember? And KJ's prolly terrorizing the park with his friends, why?" Kevin snickered and Edd gave him an incredulous look.

 _"Alone?"_

"He's 7. He's fine," Kevin said gently as he took Eddward's hand into his own, but Eddward's eyes were on the living room window that looked out on a quiet, _kid free,_ lower middle class suburban street.

Eddward swallowed the lecture in his throat because he knew the state had no minimum _unsupervised child_ age requirements even though everyone and their mother had their own recommendations.

And the child wasn't exactly _alone._ If his childhood was what Kevin and Nazz were trying to create it to be, there was probably a whole _gang_ of kids with him doing God knows what to God knows who as they ran amuck, imaginative and carefree.

Then there was Anna, who was with a friend, at a house with _several_ adults for a informal gathering to indulge in beauty products.

So they were fine and he should be kissing Kevin's face and thanking God for the mini date before Kevin had to go into _Daddy mode_ again.

"Just order the pizza, Barr," he sighed as KU and West Virginia took the field again.

* * *

Halfway through the fourth quarter, Eddward was in Kevin's lap and they were sharing the popcorn that was in in Eddward's as the raven broke down West Virginia's defense to Kevin's chagrin.

"I went there! I know what Coach is doing!"

"Can you _not?"_ Kevin whined.

"You only like KU for basketball, Kev," Eddward giggled as he stuffed another handful of popcorn in his face.

"Doesn't mean I don't want them to win! They're at home! And how in the world did we get into the Big Twelve anyways?!"

"You said, _'we,'"_ Eddward snickered as he held a popcorn kernel to his grinning lips and Kevin's about to throw him on the couch and kiss all that flirtatiousness out of him when the front door _flew open_ and KJ trudged inside, but didn't take a glance at his father or Eddward who had quickly slid out of his lap and to the other side of the couch.

 **"Drink,"** the weary kid said lowly as he went into the kitchen and got a juice pouch out of the vegetable bin before heading back outside.

"I'm ordering pizza!" Kevin called out to him and the little boy stopped short before turning wide green eyes on his dad.

 _"Cheese?!"_

"Yeah, yeah," Kevin said as he tapped at the Domino's app on his phone.

"Mr Eddward, are you staying?" KJ asked as he came to wrap his arms around Eddward's neck and hand him his juice pouch to open as he stole some popcorn.

"Yeah," Eddward said quietly as he concentrated on getting the skinny straw into the over filled pouch without spilling juice everywhere, missing Kevin's quick grin at his answer.

"SWEET! THANKS!" he called out as he ran out the door, juice pouch in hand, _slamming_ it behind him.

"Told ya, they'd be back," he said knowingly as he pulled the popcorn, _but not Eddward_ , back into his lap.

"That was _one_ child," Eddward retorted before he was pinned to the couch, the popcorn on the floor, tossed away and forgotten until the pizza delivery guy showed up and Eddward gave Kevin an earful about not cleaning up after himself.

* * *

KJ had followed the pizza delivery guy from Rolf's, a good four blocks away, and Marianne's older brother walked Anna home no more than five minutes after Kevin called their house and asked that his daughter be sent home for dinner taking on all the, _"But Da!"_ she could throw at him through the phone as she got ready to leave.

Eddward's presence at dinner was welcome; his knowledge of Pokemon blowing Kevin's away.

Just like his hug to KJ and his kiss goodbye to the boy's father after the kids were sent to their rooms to get ready for bed.

And over bedtime prayers, a tiny wish that they held in their hearts since their parents divorce three years ago came true.

Eddward would be coming around more often, just as long as KJ didn't squeeze the life out of him.

But the boy was willing to hold back if it meant his dad would keep smiling about the man who came back to Peach Creek and made an honest man out of him, so he could happily walk in the truth of what true love brings.


End file.
